Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Repercussions

I should have known that this would change D somehow. As Kel put it, it was a life altering experience for his three year old body to handle.

Both physically and mentally.

Physically D is fine, well as fine as one can be with a cast on his dominant hand. He has only asked me to take his cast of once today, as opposed to the 978745467864045 times he had asked me yesterday.

Mentally, D is shaken. Just as I'm shaken. He doesn't want to let me out of his sight, and that is just fine by me. Normal things that he would do for himself, by himself, he now asks me to help him. And he is constantly touching me. A pat here, a hug there, twirling my hair through his fingers as he stands behind me to watch his cartoons in the morning. Needing, I suppose, the tangible proof that I am there and will not be too far away if he needs me to catch him. It makes me sad.

Today was a test. Aunt B wanted to take the boys for the afternoon and dinnertime. She hadn't seen them in a while, and I was all for a little relaxation after the stressful two days that we just had. I had talked to D all morning about how much fun he would have, and for once he seemed very reluctant to go. I thought maybe a nap and another pep talk would help him prepare for some time away from Mommy.

I should have known better.

The minute I got him out of bed, he saw Aunt B and asked begged me to go with him. Aunt B and I talked and talked about all the fun he and C would have on his special afternoon with Aunt B. A trip to Grandpa's shop to drive the truck, a special shopping trip for a toy just for him, followed by dinner with a milkshake. All designed to make him feel better.

He wanted nothing to do with it.

We got him ready and out to the car and he burst into tears. Not the "fake" tears that he was known to shed when he wasn't getting his way. But the snot bursting- red face- alligator tear- gripping my hand kind of sobbing that broke my heart. He wouldn't say anything other than "Please Mommy you come wiff me".

Needless to say, I came inside and had my own snot bursting- red face- alligator tear- gripping my pillow kind of cry. T minus four hours till my buddy comes home and we can snuggle.

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